6 weeks of shaking

i'm not lost. i'm not confused. i'm not desperate for answers.

seriously life is great.
i'm just waiting. i'm progressing day by day, crossing duties of my list, learning, living in excitement, living easily, looking forward to family time and road trips.
if you asked me a month or two ago, i would have said...

"holding on to patience wearing thin"
yes, this has to be what i've been waiting for.
yes, i have to pursue this happiness i feel.
but wait, oh great.
no, i really don't know what to do, what i want.
no, this can't be happening to me.

i think all my emotions were getting shook like a snow globe
then i watched them fall as i stood still.

then i realized it's ok to feel sad and intent. but only for 60 seconds.
then i realized everything i was missing in those 60 seconds:
laughter, hope, family, talent, friends, ocean breeze, sleep.

so i got back up and filled my heart with hope and love. i smiled. and counted every blessing. i only got so far before i broke down in tears for being so selfish, failing to acknowledge these miracles before.

so on to better things!